Wednesday, July 13, 2005
Today I realized for the first time that most people around my work environment are under the impression that I know what I’m doing.
Am I under some sort of moral obligation to tell them that the expression “faked it till she kicked it” will be engraved on my tombstone?
Look, kids. Just because you ask me if I can create an organization chart, download photos into a powerpoint presentation, or research caselaw for precedents involving institutional liability issues over consensual amorous relationships in the workplace, and I say… “sure no problem,” DOES NOT mean that I’ve ever done it before. It just means that I’m pretty sure I can figure it out. So don’t go thinking I’m smart or nothing. I’m just afraid of telling people no. It has more to do with my paralyzing fear of what people think of me than my zealous “go-getter” work ethic.
You know what it is? It’s a simple mathematical equation:
Lemon = nervous, over-achieving energy propelled by a deeply rooted fear of disapproval and unacceptance
X= a task with corresponding quality expectation and date of accomplishment
Lemonade= task accomplished on time and with sufficient quality compliance
Lemon + X = Lemonade!!!
And they say a woman’s mind is complex.* Mule muffins! Take a look at the equation, pal! That’s 2nd grade arithmetic you’re looking at.
*I do however reserve the right to become inexplicably more complex in nature without prior notice and for no logical purpose whatsoever.
Love you. Kit. Have a good summer.
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