Wednesday, September 21, 2005
some serious lazy
I finish up the chat, walk the rest of the short walk to the elevator lobby and wait alongside this woman. This woman looked like she’d been waiting for 15 minutes for the crummy elevator. We wait together some more…and some more.
At last, the bell chimes, the light lights, and the doors finally open. We take our custom-sensitive positions inside the elevator; me on the far right, she on the far left.* I push “1”. The woman pushes “13”.
We picked up the elevator on the 14th floor.
This woman waited for 17 minutes to go down ONE floor. And it isn’t as if the door to the stairwell was clear across the building from where she was standing to take the elevator either. Oh no. The door to the stairwell is literally right next to the elevator door.
I could even see taking the elevator to go UP one flight, as walking up stairs tends to be a little more tiring than going down. Going UP one flight in an elevator is still pretty darn lazy, I mean come on now. But oh no. We were going down, kids. One flight down. That is the kind of lazy where you want to pay someone to push on your lungs in 2-second intervals all day so you can keep breathing.
Now all you sympathizers and nifty thinkers out there may say in response “maybe she has physical limitations and that’s why she can’t take the stairs”. And maybe you’re right. But when she exited the elevator, and the doors closed, all I could think was…that is some serious lazy. Because that’s the swift-to-judge kinda gal I am.
* One of these days, I'd like to conduct a social experiment. Only two people in an elevator, me and the other guy. And I stand so close to him that he could feel my breath on his arm. And I'll hum something obnoxious like Bolero. Maybe I'll just stare at him the whole time too. See if he does anything. Okay, so to recap:
stand real close, breathe on his arm, hum Bolero, and stare. Yeah.
Seriously, people, learn to walk.
Another pet peeve: Chicago, Water Tower Place. My mom is legitimately handicapped and we can only get from one floor to another via elevator. There are escalators. Yet lots of people feel the need to take the elevators one floor up or down and we would always wait, oh, about 17 years, for the elevator. I could have taken the escalator up, browsed, and bought something in our intended store by the time the elevator got there.
The funniest to me was at my old apartment, you'd see people clearly on their way to or from the gym who would take the elevator 2 flights or something.
and that is some serious laziness that even i, who gets attacks of the lazies, think is lazy.
the only thing i think is that maybe she was having one of those days where any more effort for anything would just put you over the edge, you know?
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