Friday, March 03, 2006

it comes with the marked territory, pal

There really are some fantastic professional opportunities out there in this land of the free.

This one requires a PhD.

There so many things I think about this.

When you first brought the puppies home, did someone forget to point out that, on occasion, your dogs will poop?

Did you not know that when you decide to keep a dog, for the remainder of that dog’s life 70% of your time with him will involve a close and personal relationship with his feces?

I did a quick survey of 500 people off the street, and the results are as follows: 9 out of 10 people would rather die of embarrassment before letting some stranger come to their house once a week and pick up their dog’s poop.

Do you place a similar ad when your children vomit?

Just how many responses are you counting on? Because last time I checked, kids aren't stupid. Undoubtedly they will hold out for a lawn-mowing gig.

Were you born lazy or did society make you this way?

Okay, I admit that last one was a bit harsh. But if you have any gut responses to this ad, please please share them here.
My gut response: They better darn well pay better than $10 a week to get someone to clean up after their dog.
Yeah, I thought 10 bucks was kinda cheap. Clearly, there is a slight issue with a serious sense of entitlement.

I mean, seriously? Ridiculous.

On the side of being nice and thinking of a reasonable explanation: perhaps they have a feces phobia. That's pretty much all I can come up with.
Ooo! Thanks for the job opportunity! Now I know where an English major can get me!
I'd do it.
Being one to give the benefit of the doubt, I note the line at the end of the ad:
"OK to repost to Job Developers for Persons with Disabilities."

Maybe this person has been recently (ie, since getting the dogs) confined to a wheelchair.
My first thought was leave the poop. It's good fertilizer.

Although maybe there's someone out there with a thing for dog poop who has just been waiting for such an opportunity. Ew.
stacer: Amen!

cat: Feces phobics have support groups, I hear. Perhaps we should volunteer? Tell them: do not fear! There is cause for cheer! The boy is here! He'll do it!

Cicada: Good luck! This seems to be a "field" full of growth opportunities.

hobo: why?

Anonymous: you make an excellent point. I would think that if this person had a disability, they'd mention it more directly as it may increase the number of responses. Then again, maybe they didn't want to use their disability as leverage.

Anyway, thanks for the "benefit of the doubt" comment.

g: you're a better person than me. I just think your last part: ew.
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