Monday, May 22, 2006

one year anniversary

Came into work this morning and found these on my desk:

They are absolutely gorgeous and smell really purty like. Chocolate truffles and lunch at the Ritz tomorrow. I know I complain a lot about how poor I am. But that's just because I'm poor. Nevertheless, I have seriously never been treated this well by bosses. And they obviously know EXACTLY what effect fresh flowers and chocolate has on me: the power to forget that I shop at Goodwill for clothes, one day before we discuss my raise. I'm not sure if I should tell my future husband about this little weakness I have; it may get exploited beyond all rationale:

Husband: Honey, I was unfaithful this week, and I went to Vegas and blew the kids' college money. And I'm not really a man. But here's some truffles and pale pink peonies...I love you, and if you can just....

Me: ...[interrupting, with feeling] Shut up. Just shut up. You had me at Truffles. (whisper-weepy) Youuu had meee at Truffles.

[passionate embrace]

The End.
You've got bigger problems if it takes you that long to discover your hypothetical husband isn't a man.
Bwahahahahaha! Man. I wish I had work anniversaries.
WOW!! I would probably drop dead if Lowell or Steve gave me that sort of treatment. You certainly are lucky to have such great attorneys!! I can barely get a hello in the morning. By the way your old boss -- Chris Hall asked me to say hello.
manda: it's a bad sign when even my hypothetical husband has deep-seeded issues, let alone all my real ones. i mean....oopsie. we'll talk about it later.

cicada: maybe annual graduations for students? Congratulations! you just graduated from your third year of college! you'll get 3 flowers, 3 truffles, they'll make a sign that says "Alllmost Theeeere!"

mary: hasn't lowell retired yet? mercy me! that man is 105 years old. give chris a hello and non-sexually harassing hug for me!
Mary, this is nothing to be ashamed of. Apparently, all I need is to be called princess, and I melt. Now add the chocolate and flowers....yeah, there's no hope.
They're not issues. They're "quirks".
are the truffles all gone? how many did you get and what kind? haha...(i'm on a diet...just wondering)...oh, and what did you have for lunch at the Ritz?

lovely flowers!
and...i think shopping at Goodwill is way more fun anyway!
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