Monday, August 14, 2006
Often the answers we seek are just beyond our veils of unbelief.
I’ve loved where my ponderings have taken me with this, and was about to share some of my thoughts. But then I realized that I’m more interested in what others might say about it, and was hoping instead to get your thoughts.
Is there an experience you’ve had with crossing over your veil of unbelief to get an answer? What happened?
Is there an experience you've had with not crossing over? What happened?
Please, please comment! (I promise to bring the funny back again soon, but I really could use some earnest discussion on this right now.)
I once heard someone say, "I couldn't handle someone in my family dying so the Lord won't do that to me." I found myself nodding my head in agreement. At an early age I thought of what was the one thing I knew I couldn't handle and it was the death of someone in my immediate family. I had already dealt with tragic death in my extended family and friends, but the Lord wouldn't let anyone in my family die--no I wouldn't be able to handle that.
Then On July 24th, 1999 my 15 yr old brother died.
...And I kept breathing, and I kept waking up every morning, and somehow I kept living. And in crossing over my "veil of disbelief" I did things I never thought possible. I picked out a coffin, I wrote an obituary, and I spoke at my little brother's funeral.
The answer: The Lord knows that I can handle far beyond what I think I am able.
I can't pin point a particular incident, but I believe it important to pass that veil of unbelief on a regular basis. Therein lies grow, and self discovery. It's been a big theme in my life this past year. Make that years. Making my life my own, and not what I think it should be according to the expectations of other parties. It's such a refreshing feeling when you realize you can overcome something hard....keep on living....even though it sucks. Joy and sorrow, pleasure and pain, this is humanity, life. To avoid circtumstances that allow us to feel these, or simply not being willing to feel, and cope despite what happens around us is a shame. This is how I come to know myself, and my maker.
Something like that.
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