Monday, October 02, 2006

three items

Three items I would like to report from this past weekend…

Item 1
In a feat never before accomplished, I managed to leave my cell phone at a friend’s house on Friday night, and another friend’s house the following Saturday night. Conclusion: I really, really don’t feel like talking to anyone right now.

Item 2
In a feat never before attempted, I managed to lock my keys in my car with the car running in front of a Dunkin’ Donuts. My silver Suzy idled for almost an hour while I tried to find someone to drive me back to my place for the spare key. I missed the first 20 minutes of Saturday morning session. Conclusion: donuts make me stupid. Also fat.

Item 3
In a feat seldom witnessed in my LDS singles culture, I and my two gals Rachel and Peggy managed to be pampered, fed an OUTSTANDING dinner, praised, loved, massaged, and entertained last night by two wonderful (also sinfully attractive) men (that's m-e-n.) while the rest of my Relief Society sisters were the ones doing all the cooking, pampering, feeding, praising, loving, massaging and entertaining for other brethren elsewhere. Conclusion: more sisters need to take off the apron for two seconds, find real men, and get the same treatment. (I like Peggy’s rule on this: “unless you’re kissing me, I ain’t feedin’ ya.”)

Items 1 and 2, and the symptoms which predicated them, melted entirely away thanks to Item 3. Thanks, boys. Big fat kisses to both of you.


Hey where do I find these real men...point the way!

Actually I am not a man hater and I think the guys around here are great!
Why, Ms. Kyles...are you inferring I am a man hater? So not true!
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