Wednesday, October 17, 2007

methods of reasoning

This morning on my way into work, a toothless, crazy homeless man riding a rusty bike on the sidewalk pedals past me and says, “Ooooo. Sexy.” These were my thoughts following that, using the skills acquired through a methods of reasoning course during freshman year of college:

1. Crazy men who have not teeth do not make truthful or valid statements.
2. Therefore, I am not sexy.
3. Normal attractive men make truthful and valid statements.
4. Normal attractive men do not ride past me and say, “Ooooo. Sexy.”
5. Therefore, I am not sexy.

Based solely on the tenets of logical cognition, I conclude that this reasoning is FALSE. And so I ponder further:

1. Crazy people usually say the things we are too afraid to say.
2. Normal attractive men usually stay away from saying things that sound crazy.
3. Crazy man said I was sexy.
4. Normal attractive men usually are too afraid to say I am sexy.

This reasoning is SOMEWHAT TRUE. We’re getting warmer. [Note that this posit does not argue whether or not I am sexy, only whether one should say so. While pedaling a rusty bicycle down a sidewalk.]

And then like a beacon of great light, I uncover the truth:

1. Perception is reality.
2. I perceive that I am attractive on numerous levels.
3. Crazy man says I am sexy.
4. Normal attractive man says nothing.
5. I am attractive on numerous levels.

Statements 3 & 4 have no bearing on Statements 1 & 2. Statement 5 is TRUE.

I rode up the fourteen floors of my building beaming. Don’t you just love logic?


I gotta say, I thought you were going to settle on your first posit. I'm so glad you thought this through and came upon the truth! Crazy men tell no lies. Also, dead men.
Furthermore, I'd like to suggest that you're too sexy for your logic.
NEVER question your sense of logic. Remember...when in doubt:

"I am a nobody, nobody is perfect, and therefore I am perfect!"

Works every time. :)
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