Wednesday, September 27, 2006
bananas flambe
So it's not quite finished...which is a problem since it's kinda due tonight. I need more at the end, some of it is clunky. But since I mentioned it earlier, I thought it would be fun to post the dessert scene. Sorry, it's long. For a blog post, that is.
I went with Cicada's suggestion of Bananas Flambe, and actually got the first line of dialogue from the recipe for same.
Constructive criticism is greatly appreciated! Ripping to shreds is mildly appreciated. Ethnic slurs would just be inappropriate, so please avoid those. Thanks.
"Bananas Flambe"
(GUY and GAIL at a restaurant. Server has just delivered their dessert.)
GUY:
Caution is the rule whenever liquors are ignited.
GAIL:
Hmmm…
GUY:
One must ignite carefully.
GAIL:
I hope the bananas were fully ripe prior to…
GUY:
[finishing her thought.] Ignition?
GAIL:
[looks up and smiles.] I love you.
GUY:
[takes GAIL’s hand.] Start your engines.
(GUY picks up fork, GAIL follows. They clink forks and dig in. Beat.)
GAIL:
Love the cinnamon.
GUY:
Mm hmm. Why ripe bananas?
GAIL:
What?
GUY:
Why do you hope for fully-ripe bananas?
GAIL:
You mean as opposed to non-ripe bananas?
GUY:
Yeah.
GAIL:
Oh, well...they’re more satisfying. Better for cooking. There’s a more mature taste to a ripe banana.
GUY:
But aren’t ripe bananas…mushy?
GAIL:
Soft, yeah. Spongy. And bananas have more nutritional value when they’re fully ripe. [playfully] Helps you grow big and strong!
GUY:
Okay, but…they’re brown. They’re bruised. They got spots on ‘em.
GAIL:
Sometimes, yeah. But they’re better for you.
GUY:
I don’t like ripe bananas.
GAIL:
Okay, by themselves, maybe they’re not so great I grant you. They’re not as…I don’t know…tasty. The peel isn’t as firm, I know. You’re eating around the brown spots, etcetera. But in a recipe, like this one…those things don’t matter. In the dessert, you don’t even notice the spots. They’re better to cook with. You get a much better dessert experience. Don’t you think?
GUY:
[skeptical] Maybe. I’m not sure I really care.
GAIL:
‘Bout what?
GUY:
I don’t care if it’s ripe or not.
GAIL:
You would if you knew the difference.
GUY:
I know the difference.
GAIL:
No you don’t.
GUY:
Sure I do.
GAIL:
If you knew you were eating a non-ripe banana, eventually you’d figure it out.
GUY:
Yeah. But I’m saying I don’t think it would matter. Ripe, non-ripe…it’s still served with rum. I’m a happy boy!
GAIL:
And I’m saying if you knew how important it was, you’d know it does matter. Rum can give you headaches you know.
GUY:
[looks right at her.] Oh, I know. Believe me, darling.
GAIL:
I’m just saying. Rum isn’t everything.
GUY:
But it’s something.
[GAIL looks annoyed.]
Come on! Rum is very important, you know that. It’s the flame component. It’s the flammable. It’s the flambé in Bananas Flambe, for the love of Zeus!
GAIL:
All I said was it wasn’t everything!
GUY:
But you make it seem as though it means nothing at all, when you know it does.
GAIL:
[laying out her argument] A banana is far more key in this dessert than the rum.
GUY:
Perhaps. But bananas alone do not a flambé make! You need the rum. This dessert has two words in its title. “Bananas.” “Flambe.” Judging solely from its name, I’d say they are equal in importance.
GAIL:
“Bananas” is first.
GUY:
You said yourself bananas are nasty on their own.
GAIL:
Ripe bananas! Less tasty, I said.
GUY:
And I’m agreeing with you!
GAIL:
Okay, I get you like the rum. Yes, rum. Very important. Everyone likes the rum! Yay!
GUY:
Gail…
GAIL:
I mean doesn’t it kind of go without saying that rum is the favorite here? Rum’s got nothing to do with it! The rum goes up in flames, it evaporates!
GUY:
Exactly my point! This is the crucial component of FLAM-BAY!
(Beat.)
Actually, it’s not the rum. It’s the fire I like. I like flames. I like that my bananas were once enflamed.
(GAIL forks a big piece of her banana and begins to wave it around during her speech)
Gail…what the…?
GAIL:
Who will stand for the banana?! You obviously won’t. I guess it has to be me.
GUY:
You want some ice cream? Here. [turns the plate counterclockwise.]
GAIL:
Because I submit to you that were it not for the banana this pathetic, disregarded, underappreciated miserable, so-called mushy mass of pulp for fruit is actually the very corner piece of this dessert! We simply would not be here tonight without it! We are lost! Without it, what do we have? Rum, some fleeting flames, and a little spice! And ice cream! And how long can you live off that? You can only go so long without……………without…………shoot. What’s that thing bananas have?
GUY:
I’m sorry?
GAIL:
The nutritional thing. What is it?
GUY:
Gail, can you please put the fork down?
(GAIL stares at the piece of banana on her fork as if it will give her the answer.)
GAIL:
How can you be so obtuse?
GUY:
All right, what? Do you want me to say that the banana is the most important part of bananas flambé?
GAIL:
Only if you know that that’s the truth.
GUY:
Well, I’m telling you I’m not sure I do. But if you want me to say it…
GAIL:
Then don’t.
GUY:
Fine.
(Several beats. GUY picks up a menu and starts reading.)
Says here they prepared the bananas in a chafing dish.
GAIL:
Potassium!!!
GUY:
Potassium.
GAIL:
Potassium.
GUY:
[takes her hand]. Love the potassium.
GAIL:
[softening] It’s good for you.
GUY:
[gently] I know.
Scene.
I went with Cicada's suggestion of Bananas Flambe, and actually got the first line of dialogue from the recipe for same.
Constructive criticism is greatly appreciated! Ripping to shreds is mildly appreciated. Ethnic slurs would just be inappropriate, so please avoid those. Thanks.
"Bananas Flambe"
(GUY and GAIL at a restaurant. Server has just delivered their dessert.)
GUY:
Caution is the rule whenever liquors are ignited.
GAIL:
Hmmm…
GUY:
One must ignite carefully.
GAIL:
I hope the bananas were fully ripe prior to…
GUY:
[finishing her thought.] Ignition?
GAIL:
[looks up and smiles.] I love you.
GUY:
[takes GAIL’s hand.] Start your engines.
(GUY picks up fork, GAIL follows. They clink forks and dig in. Beat.)
GAIL:
Love the cinnamon.
GUY:
Mm hmm. Why ripe bananas?
GAIL:
What?
GUY:
Why do you hope for fully-ripe bananas?
GAIL:
You mean as opposed to non-ripe bananas?
GUY:
Yeah.
GAIL:
Oh, well...they’re more satisfying. Better for cooking. There’s a more mature taste to a ripe banana.
GUY:
But aren’t ripe bananas…mushy?
GAIL:
Soft, yeah. Spongy. And bananas have more nutritional value when they’re fully ripe. [playfully] Helps you grow big and strong!
GUY:
Okay, but…they’re brown. They’re bruised. They got spots on ‘em.
GAIL:
Sometimes, yeah. But they’re better for you.
GUY:
I don’t like ripe bananas.
GAIL:
Okay, by themselves, maybe they’re not so great I grant you. They’re not as…I don’t know…tasty. The peel isn’t as firm, I know. You’re eating around the brown spots, etcetera. But in a recipe, like this one…those things don’t matter. In the dessert, you don’t even notice the spots. They’re better to cook with. You get a much better dessert experience. Don’t you think?
GUY:
[skeptical] Maybe. I’m not sure I really care.
GAIL:
‘Bout what?
GUY:
I don’t care if it’s ripe or not.
GAIL:
You would if you knew the difference.
GUY:
I know the difference.
GAIL:
No you don’t.
GUY:
Sure I do.
GAIL:
If you knew you were eating a non-ripe banana, eventually you’d figure it out.
GUY:
Yeah. But I’m saying I don’t think it would matter. Ripe, non-ripe…it’s still served with rum. I’m a happy boy!
GAIL:
And I’m saying if you knew how important it was, you’d know it does matter. Rum can give you headaches you know.
GUY:
[looks right at her.] Oh, I know. Believe me, darling.
GAIL:
I’m just saying. Rum isn’t everything.
GUY:
But it’s something.
[GAIL looks annoyed.]
Come on! Rum is very important, you know that. It’s the flame component. It’s the flammable. It’s the flambé in Bananas Flambe, for the love of Zeus!
GAIL:
All I said was it wasn’t everything!
GUY:
But you make it seem as though it means nothing at all, when you know it does.
GAIL:
[laying out her argument] A banana is far more key in this dessert than the rum.
GUY:
Perhaps. But bananas alone do not a flambé make! You need the rum. This dessert has two words in its title. “Bananas.” “Flambe.” Judging solely from its name, I’d say they are equal in importance.
GAIL:
“Bananas” is first.
GUY:
You said yourself bananas are nasty on their own.
GAIL:
Ripe bananas! Less tasty, I said.
GUY:
And I’m agreeing with you!
GAIL:
Okay, I get you like the rum. Yes, rum. Very important. Everyone likes the rum! Yay!
GUY:
Gail…
GAIL:
I mean doesn’t it kind of go without saying that rum is the favorite here? Rum’s got nothing to do with it! The rum goes up in flames, it evaporates!
GUY:
Exactly my point! This is the crucial component of FLAM-BAY!
(Beat.)
Actually, it’s not the rum. It’s the fire I like. I like flames. I like that my bananas were once enflamed.
(GAIL forks a big piece of her banana and begins to wave it around during her speech)
Gail…what the…?
GAIL:
Who will stand for the banana?! You obviously won’t. I guess it has to be me.
GUY:
You want some ice cream? Here. [turns the plate counterclockwise.]
GAIL:
Because I submit to you that were it not for the banana this pathetic, disregarded, underappreciated miserable, so-called mushy mass of pulp for fruit is actually the very corner piece of this dessert! We simply would not be here tonight without it! We are lost! Without it, what do we have? Rum, some fleeting flames, and a little spice! And ice cream! And how long can you live off that? You can only go so long without……………without…………shoot. What’s that thing bananas have?
GUY:
I’m sorry?
GAIL:
The nutritional thing. What is it?
GUY:
Gail, can you please put the fork down?
(GAIL stares at the piece of banana on her fork as if it will give her the answer.)
GAIL:
How can you be so obtuse?
GUY:
All right, what? Do you want me to say that the banana is the most important part of bananas flambé?
GAIL:
Only if you know that that’s the truth.
GUY:
Well, I’m telling you I’m not sure I do. But if you want me to say it…
GAIL:
Then don’t.
GUY:
Fine.
(Several beats. GUY picks up a menu and starts reading.)
Says here they prepared the bananas in a chafing dish.
GAIL:
Potassium!!!
GUY:
Potassium.
GAIL:
Potassium.
GUY:
[takes her hand]. Love the potassium.
GAIL:
[softening] It’s good for you.
GUY:
[gently] I know.
Scene.
Labels: writing
Comments:
<< Home
Awesome. P.s. Did you mean she waves the fork around during his speech? Cause Gail's not talking at that point.
I liked it... captures the wierdness of those occassional relationship spats which ultimately mean very little. I think it's an effort to establish our seperateness a bit so we can enjoy the one-ness.
I liked it... captures the wierdness of those occassional relationship spats which ultimately mean very little. I think it's an effort to establish our seperateness a bit so we can enjoy the one-ness.
Yay! You chose my dessert! But I thought that they weren't supposed to be arguing over the dessert itself...
Mooney: Thanks for the feedback. That was confusing.
Cic: The object was to have them discuss only the dessert without it having anything to do with the dessert.
Post a Comment
Cic: The object was to have them discuss only the dessert without it having anything to do with the dessert.
Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]
<< Home
Subscribe to Posts [Atom]
